I thought I'd have the self-control to leave FCN for good. I have principles you know!
Okay let me try that again.
I thought I'd have the self-control to leave FCN for good.
There. That's a much better start.
The fact is, the last three months were utter [lasagna]. I managed to keep the days full but there was just something missing. I often layed awake at night wondering things. Most of them had nothing to do with FCN. You know - zebras, the Egyptians - that sort of thing. But every now and then, I had a spasm. It went something like:
spasm"I have an FCN post!"/spasm
Said spasms just kept getting worse. Last night it was really bad. It was more like:
spasm"[Cranberries]! I need to write a post right now or I'll [flake] my [potato]!!"/spasm
Well, you've all flaked your potatoes at one time another, so you know how painful that can be. I knew drastic measures were in order. I had three options:
1. Join rFCN.
2. Start the FCN Zombies blog.
3. Go back to FCN and beg for forgiveness.
Option one involved tracking down the rFCN email address. Option two involved some level of technical competence. Number three was clearly my ticket.
We had a conference last night. I'll give you the short summary: there were spatulas. Owie. But we're good now. I even made up with Chip, who's a lazy rotten small-creature-infested scumbag, so that's really saying something. The team agreed to let me go back to the usual posting schedule, whatever that means. And I got my old position and pay back, whatever THAT means. I mean what the [petunias].
I'm back. I know, it's pretty small news next to Chip getting official last week. But it's true. I'm back. I'm only slightly more bitter and cynical than I was when I left. And I'll get started right away supplying the ... content you've come to expect from this blog. [Hurray]! Effective immediately, F is back!