Chelsea has a problem.
Chelsea has a tooth ache.
Chelsea goes to the dentist.
The dentist tells Chelsea that her wisdom teeth will have to go.
Chelsea schedules an appointment.
The next week, Chelsea goes in for her surgery.
A nurse puts Chelsea in a special chair.
The doctor puts a needle into Chelsea's arm.
Chelsea falls asleep.
Chelsea wakes up a little later.
Four of her teeth are missing.
Chelsea is very, very groggy.
Chelsea stumbles back to her car.
After several failed attempts, Chelsea puts the key in the ignition and drives away.
Five minutes later, Chelsea feels a terrible pain in her jaw.
Chelsea tries to open her mouth.
Chelsea can't.
The pain gets worse.
Chelsea can't take it anymore.
Chelsea pulls over at a local pub.
Chelsea knocks back several shots of Jack Daniel's.
Chelsea can't remember how many.
Chelsea feels better.
Chelsea resumes the drive home.
Chelsea is too drunk to notice that she is in the wrong vehicle.
Chelsea doesn't realize she has exploited a set of keys that were left in the ignition of an old van.
Chelsea feels weak and happy.
Chelsea's foot slowly descends on the gas pedal.
Chelsea's stolen vehicle goes faster and faster.
Soon, Chelsea is rocketing down the road at a hundred miles an hour.
A police car signals for Chelsea to pull over.
Chelsea doesn't notice.
Chelsea drives faster.
Chelsea's van drifts into oncoming traffic.
Then Chelsea gets a phone call.
Chelsea fumbles for her cell phone.
Chelsea opens the phone and asks who is calling.
Seconds later, Chelsea's van slams into another car.
Chelsea is unhurt.
The other driver spends six months in therapy.
The other driver's insurance company refuses to pay.
Chelsea's insurance company refuses to pay.
Chelsea was driving under the influence of alcohol and general anesthesia.
Chelsea was resisting arrest.
Chelsea was manning a stolen vehicle.
Chelsea was speeding.
Chelsea was driving in the wrong lane.
Chelsea does doing what any red-blooded American would do.
Chelsea sues her dentist and is awarded six million dollars by a sympathetic jury.
Chelsea goes to the dentist.
The dentist tells Chelsea that her wisdom teeth will have to go.
Chelsea schedules an appointment.
The next week, Chelsea goes in for her surgery.
A nurse puts Chelsea in a special chair.
The doctor puts a needle into Chelsea's arm.
Chelsea falls asleep.
Chelsea wakes up a little later.
Four of her teeth are missing.
Chelsea is very, very groggy.
Chelsea stumbles back to her car.
After several failed attempts, Chelsea puts the key in the ignition and drives away.
Five minutes later, Chelsea feels a terrible pain in her jaw.
Chelsea tries to open her mouth.
Chelsea can't.
The pain gets worse.
Chelsea can't take it anymore.
Chelsea pulls over at a local pub.
Chelsea knocks back several shots of Jack Daniel's.
Chelsea can't remember how many.
Chelsea feels better.
Chelsea resumes the drive home.
Chelsea is too drunk to notice that she is in the wrong vehicle.
Chelsea doesn't realize she has exploited a set of keys that were left in the ignition of an old van.
Chelsea feels weak and happy.
Chelsea's foot slowly descends on the gas pedal.
Chelsea's stolen vehicle goes faster and faster.
Soon, Chelsea is rocketing down the road at a hundred miles an hour.
A police car signals for Chelsea to pull over.
Chelsea doesn't notice.
Chelsea drives faster.
Chelsea's van drifts into oncoming traffic.
Then Chelsea gets a phone call.
Chelsea fumbles for her cell phone.
Chelsea opens the phone and asks who is calling.
Seconds later, Chelsea's van slams into another car.
Chelsea is unhurt.
The other driver spends six months in therapy.
The other driver's insurance company refuses to pay.
Chelsea's insurance company refuses to pay.
Chelsea was driving under the influence of alcohol and general anesthesia.
Chelsea was resisting arrest.
Chelsea was manning a stolen vehicle.
Chelsea was speeding.
Chelsea was driving in the wrong lane.
Chelsea does doing what any red-blooded American would do.
Chelsea sues her dentist and is awarded six million dollars by a sympathetic jury.
7 comments:
Lunacy!
Ah the joys of the American legal system!
oi. things like this make me mad. whether you guyses made it up or not it's not outside the realm of possiblity, which makes it pitiful. and strangely, i also find it funny, in a black humor kind of way.
*sigh* what is the world coming to...
thats funny, but the legal system in america is going down the tube...
Sucks to be the driver she hit. No one would pay for him/her.
now don't you feel safe here in America? We take the side of drunk drivers! (Note to guitarbob: the legal system in America went down the tubes a looooong time ago)
YAY for justice!
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