More Reasons We Hate America

It's taken us two years to do, but we finally have two more reasons why America is not the bomb.

Military Spending

The USA spends more on its military than any other nation in the world. In fact, it spends more than nine times more than the runner up, China (Woo! Go China!). That's appalling. It demonstrates a brutality and naivete that is second to none.

First, it says: America is the good guy, so it's justified in spending money on guns. But that doesn't logically follow. You know what we call countries that love war enough to spend six hundred and fifty trillion dollars on it each year? War mongers. And war mongers shouldn't be allowed to have guns. The only people who should are the ones who don't.

Second, it says: America has lots of enemies. Which is also something of a chicken and the egg. How many foreign soldiers are positioned in or threatening America? Probably somewhere between zero and none. How many American soldiers are positioned in or threatening foreign countries? Hundreds of thousands, bro. No wonder everyone hates us, which is why we convince ourselves we need a big army. Maybe if we spent less on tanks and more on flowers, people would suddenly stop hating us.

Government Structure
America is divided into fifty states; each of those states have counties and those counties have cities. Except for LA. That city has counties. Anyway, millions of dollars are spent on each election (in campaigns and administrative costs), but Americans can't seem to stop holding them. They vote on all kinds of things. There are thousands and thousands of elected officials in America, and thousands of thousands of voter-approved laws.

The whole country is enslaved by popular opinion, caught up in this democracy fad that's been taking off over the last few centuries. Everyone has an opinion about something, and precious time is wasted making sure everyone gets their say. What a waste! Consider a form of government that has been far more popular historically - in fact, it's been somewhere on the planet for thousands and thousands of years. Despotism is hyper efficient. It tosses out all these stuck-up notions of equality in favor of a system where accountability goes in just one direction: from the top down.


Now go enjoy your fireworks. But not too much.