What does the world cost? Oh well, then we'll just take a small coke.


Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Reader Number Six

It's another huge milestone in the meteoric rise of FCN: we have just gained our sixth reader. Now we are truly on a roll. We are taking the blogosphere by storm, folks. Nothing can stand in our way. Through sheer force of will and desperation, we are overwhelming lesser blogs that are based on talent, humor, or class. Nothing can stand in our way now. Our progress may be slow by the standards of some, but it is also inexorable. According to Uncle Wally's homemade calculator, if our trend continues (which it will), then in just a little over 79,059,829 years, we'll have every internet user in America drooling over our content.



Our sixth reader is from Zimbabwe, or as they say in those parts: Mbuku gabeli click clack guber.

We realize that, by current longevity standards, it is highly unlikely that we will survive long enough to see FCN dominate the world. However, the FCN team is full of visionary thinkers. By a vote of 2 to 1, we agreed to freeze-dry Dan and stick him into cryogenic sleep, to be awakened when the current FCN team is done for. Dan will appoint a new FCN team from amongst the loyal ranks of the LLFCN, then tuck himself back into the freezer for a few more decades. This way, the FCN legacy will never die, unless of course there's a power outage at Dan's storage facility.

We've come to some other brilliant ideas, too. But it wouldn't be right to unveil them all at once. We ingenious derelicts have something truly spectacular planned to celebrate our sixth reader, and as soon as we get the details hammered out, we'll rush it out to you so you can blow out the candles.

Look out world. FCN is coming.

See you in 76 million years.

7 comments:

Hank The Janitor said...

Wow, that's a very interesting idea. You sure are dedicated. I wonder who was on the 1 end of that vote....

A City in Germany said...

You boys are getting more batty by the day. I am afraid that I may need to get a black-cloaked coalition together to take Dan away out of your clutches.

Anonymous said...

But how come you normally get more than 6 comments?

Anonymous said...

It says I'm unique visitor number 6... interesting.

Team Cheese said...

I think you need to get a life. Eat cheese with mustard for a few days. That'l wake you up.

Halo Trujello said...

"Forzen peas? It's in the door, in between the TV dinners and Dan..."

Now which one of you voted against that??

And how can there only be 6 unique visitors? I know for a fact that there are waaay more than 6 people who visit this site regularly...

Anonymous said...

hehehe... that'd be ME!!! =D