What does the world cost? Oh well, then we'll just take a small coke.


Thursday, April 26, 2007

Announcing the Official FCN Mom

We're told there's something inspiring about three lonesome, misdirected students stumbling blindly through the universe bumping their shins on things. We're also told there's something equally inspiring about having their every poorly planned misdeed shamelessly recorded for six people to read. The thing is, we at FCN can't figure out what's so inspiring about it. We find it rather demoralizing, actually. We try so hard to succeed. Perhaps what we need is a little more parental guidance.

We all have mothers of some kind or another. For some of us, our biological mother fills the maternal role (and does so quite nicely, may we add without sounding like we want more dinner tonight). For others, a caring female figure who grants motherly advice when it’s needed steps up to fill the role. Regardless, the mother is the cornerstone of a family and very important to the development of the individual.

We don’t mean to sound like Freud; we do mean to say that mothers have been prominent figures in our own lives and that we regret that FCN doesn’t have the "maternal advantage."

FCN is yet a wee weblog and is still in its developing state. With only a few faithful readers to boast of and tons of awesome content yet to be imagined, we are in dire need of a good mother to keep us on the straight and narrow. Unfortunately, FCN lacks a biological mom – the online condition of a blog renders physical parents an impossibility – and we must therefore seek out an unfortunate soul to substitute for our non-existent natural parent.

As you, the faithful FCN few, well know, the writing team here is a bunch of derelicts who defy correction and are, to wit, ungovernable. The task of mothering us is a difficult one (not unlike running an orphanage – "Oliver Twist," not "Annie") and we understand the trepidation that accompanies any attempt. We need a mom who can offer us her cyber-shoulder when our love lives go off the deep end. We need a mom who will understand when we wash down large quantities of taquitos with liquid myocardial infarction. We need a mom who can take a joke and give one at the same time.

And we've found one.

By a vote of 3-0, the FCN team has agreed to adopt Mrs G as the Official FCN Mom (she gave us permission after we promised to floss). "Mommy G" will serve as a supporting member of the FCN team, only the second person to gain this distinction since Uncle Wally started handling our technology. She will provide guidance, instruction, support, and brownies to the hard-working team in exchange for an occasional thank you and the satisfaction of a job well done.

Welcome to the team, Mommy G. We look forward to many happy years together (and when we say many, we really do mean many).

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Very Funny, very original. Keep it up! Daniel F., rebelutionary.

Anonymous said...

Who in der rite mind wull pay 25 buks for a lowzy teeshirt???! :)

Anonymous said...

Once again I find myself laughing myself silly.. I read it to my mom and she loved this blog! Absolutely brilliant!
You guys rock!

Anonymous said...

Well, Mommy G is happy and pleased to be a part of the FCN team. I will do my level best to guide and encourage the FCNers in times of crisis. And remember, just like your own moms, I have cyber eyes in the back of my head, and I will be always watching......

Anonymous said...

Congratulations on your choice of mother! Mrs. G is an excellent woman and I'm sure she'll despense equally excellent advice!

Is there any room in the FCN family for a sis? ;)

Anonymous said...

Hugs and kisses, adrialien. I'll bake you some cookies!
Mommy G

Anonymous said...

I smell cookies.............

Anonymous said...

What kind????????? I hope peanut butter. I like peanut butter cookies.