What does the world cost? Oh well, then we'll just take a small coke.

Saturday, April 05, 2008

Saturday Commentary on the Comments

EDIT: As of some time this afternoon, the post I wrote is officially the MOST POPULAR FCN POST EVER! The new record to break is 25 comments. I sure hope FCN has it in them!

These last few days have been a lot of fun and I'll really miss being in control of this blog. When I began planning my takeover a few weeks ago, I couldn't help walking around with a big grin on my face. That grin hasn't left me for more than 5 seconds in the 5 days I've had FCN under my thumb.

It's been terribly amusing to read the readers' comments and before I sign off forever, I'd like to address some of those commenters (commentors?). I'll start with April 1st's comments and end with yesterday's.

guitarbob: You may pride yourself on your ability to call April Fool's jokes, but you totally missed it on this one.

matt: Deliver the you-know-whats to 480 S. Marion Pkwy, Building A. Please leave the goods with the doorman and ask him to see that "Carleen" on the 6th floor receives it.

chris: You're right, it was an elaborate hoax. One that worked, too, since my goal was to fool the faithful into believing that FCN had not been hijacked.

big: Here's an aspirin. Hope it helps.

rob: Where's that post? And really, promoting your knock-off site on the site you knocked-off is is lamer than lame.

lazr: Good thing FCN doesn't base its self-esteem on the Blogger choice awards, isn't it?

matt: Would you like to join my cheerleading squad?

batman: No. Because. Classified.

big: Done.

OK, enough of that drivel. Now for the interesting part:

The Top 7 Most Popular Posts in FCN's History

Instead of using Uncle Wally's garbled formula to determine which posts in FCN's past were the most appreciated, I decided to use a simpler method and based the following statistics on the number of comments each post received. For the long-time readers who remember LLFCN, following the links will take you on a pleasant walk down memory lane; for the new FCN readers, the links will provide a valuable glimpse into FCN's past.

#7. Two posts tie for seventh place, each one clocking in at 16 comments. The most recent was a retelling of a famous fairytale by FCN's last-but-certainly-not-least author. It tied with the 2nd Todd post. The first one had only half as many comments.

#6. Here we have a 3-way tie. These posts received 17 comments each. All three were written in 2008. If you add up the numbers 2+0+0+8, it doesn't equal 17. I don't think it's a coincidence, though, that two of those posts are do-it-yourselfers, and the last is a high in a long series of lows.

#5. With 18 comments, number three is all by itself. It includes a video that contains the most highbrow discussion of facial hair to ever grace this site. Ok, sorry. Bad pun.

#4. We once again have a 2-post tie. This daring duo amps it up to 19 comments and tells us just how long a post should be and why we should always pay heed to fortune cookies.

#3. I don't know why there are no posts with 20 comments, but for some reason FCN's readers saw fit to skip that quantity and go right to 21. It should come as no surprise that this was the 1st Do-It-Yourself Post.

#2. I have to say I was shocked when I realized one of the posts I wrote would be included in this list. Having received 23 comments, it came in just 2 shy of breaking the FCN record.

#1. Finally, number one in the Most Popular Countdown received 24 comments, for what reader can resist the opportunity to tell FCN which posts to repost?

Well, I hope you all enjoyed this peek into FCN's past as much as I did!

Goodbye for now,
Your hijacker


Tim said...

I want to assure the regular contributers that the number of comments on a post has absolutely no relation to its quality or appreciation. As proof, I submit the fact that I am commenting on this post which is absolutely literarily worthless.

Ron said...

Dear Hacker,
I liked your sideburns. Why did you remove the picture though?
I still have it, thankfully. I saved it. You have a funny mouth. You also have a funny nose.
Actually, you have an ugly face. But you have cool sideburns.

Ron said...

Dear Hacker,
Since your post of your ugly face with the sideburns disappeared, here is a link to the picture.

Ron said...

Here it is again, in a different format:

Ron said...

Dear Hacker,
Notice how the number of comments does not mean that this post is the most popular?
Once I post this comment there will be five comments, and only two of them relevant to the post.

Anonymous said...

Dear Hacker/Hijacker

Your vitriolic statements toward those who gave you advice (such as "Lazrmagnt") statements of that kind are only alowed to be made by commenters and RFCN (JK on second) when you breach that you anger you readership which temporarily increases it but it is not something you should fuel.

Your cavalier attitude must not be rewarded.

you can call me batman said...

So, F, C, and N have finally gotten bored with stealing their own blog. good, because it was really starting to get boring.

Matthew said...

I dropped it off, but Carleen said she didn't know you. Funny...

sideburn lover said...

Okay, that was really fun!! Now put your photo back up...it is a very becoming photo compared to the vision I had in my mind concerning your appearence. I pictured a woman with a 5 o'clock shadow. Oh, and a unibrow. Presumably one of T's many lady followers.
Thank you, sir for the trip down memory lane.

big mo said...

well, i hope you've had fun, dude.

i have to say, the hijacking thing was clever, and i'm sure you were entertained.

i was only worried that it was permanent. now that i see it was not, i can laugh.

*laughs heartily*

oh, and thanks for the asprin, it worked wonders.

dawg said...

...Here is a comment to make this one of the popular posts:)

dawg said...

...and another

dawg said...

lakjhdlfkdhl vhljkdshlkh


Anonymous said...

Hey hacker...please delete that dawg from the site while you can AND block him! He brings the integrity of this place *dawg down*
Plus he cheats by posting very irrelevant and silly posts.

Udontwannakno said...

I'm kind of glad that this "hacker" isn't going to be doing FCN anymore, but then again, it was pretty funny. Though I am getting rather tired of the pink, green and gray background. (It looks funky.)