What does the world cost? Oh well, then we'll just take a small coke.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Congratulations are in order!

Last weekend brought success to a formerly spurned sect of American society, granting legitimacy to a long rejected worldview. Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, the political thought of America’s liberals was affirmed on Sunday the last, as the “Chicks of Dixie” took the top spots at the Granny Music Awards.

Looking frightfully anemic (and I thought Texans were big) in their maternity dresses, Emily Robinson, Natalie Maines and Martie Maguire showed the world they were Not Ready to Make Nice (a clever pun, do you agree?) nor dress decently. They strutted across stage and collected their gaudy trophies with style completely unbefitting a Texan.

Actually the singers are ready to make nice, at least to hear lead singer Natalie “Ashamed of Bush” Maines tell it. She told the audience of grandmothers that she was prepared to take reconciliatory action, exclaiming: “I'm ready to make nice!”

When I read Maines explanation the day after the Granny back-scratching-orgy, there wasn’t a dry eye in the FCN house. How impeccably profound! Could Hemmingway have dreamed up such eloquence? This might be too recondite for Al Gore’s Internet!

Despite her remonstrations to the contrary, we are willing to bet Maines’ hair extensions that the Chicks of Dixie aren’t ready to make nice. They have “bad girl” written all over their mascara smeared faces and, quite frankly, this new act is making some serious mullah. The band, new persona and all, dominates Cindy Sheehan’s ipod playlists and, we have it on respectable report, the singers may have finagled a way into Anna Nicole Smith’s inheritance money.

But today is a day for congratulations, not derision. The “Chicks of Dixie” have taken one mighty leap towards their own personal eudaimonia. The band has swung on a mighty pendulum from fad to boycott and back again. The current position of the sultry voiced trio is, as is evidenced the Grandmother’s picks, on the popular side and we should rejoice with the group at this juncture.  And pray that no one is in the way when they go swinging back again.

Let’s enjoy the moment with the glib strumming, blonde talking, dumb singing trio who’s next album will, no doubt, be titled “Ne Ner Ne Ner Ne Ner" and be marketed to the wide variety of aficionados who like their music sans genre.

1 comment:

hannah said...

Most of the people I know like the genre sans dixie chicks, and would prefer to keep it that way!